Punishment vs. Discipline

If you love somebody, you're going to care enough to correct that personOne of the biggest challenges of parenting is the disciplining of children. This is often a place of contention between spouses.  There are no perfect children [sorry folks.] They need discipline, accountability, and training. Just as God disciplines us because he loves us, we should do the same for our children. Sometimes we get punishment and discipline confused. They are not the same. While God does discipline us as Christ-followers, He never punishes us. Christ took our punishment with Him to the Cross. There's a big difference between punishment and sin.

• The purpose of punishment is to inflict penalty. The purpose of discipline is to promote growth.
• The focus of punishment is on the past — what you've done wrong. The focus of discipline is on the future — what you can be.
•  The attitude behind punishment is anger. The attitude behind discipline is love.

I must confess, much of my early parenting was more punishment than discipline. I remember one time that I got down on my knees (to get eye-to-eye) to my four year-old son and asked him to forgive me for spanking him in anger. He needed disciplined but I gave him punishment. 

In fact, when you correct in anger, it always producers one thing: resentment. What God says to do is to correct while looking toward the future, making sure the mistake won’t be repeated. Focusing on the future is redemptive, not destructive.

"Correct your children while there is still hope; do not let them destroy themselves.” (Proverbs 19:18 NCV)